Posted by Rocky Jones on June 18, 2001 at 15:20:55:
I'm beginning to think that my eating so much of the wrong kinds of food is some sort of disease. Something much deeper and bigger than me. I mean, I'm a reasonable guy -- why in the hell would I go through all the trouble, eating right, feeling hungry most of the time, exercising a lot, lose all that weight, happily buy a BUNCH of 34 waist pants and parade around in my hot new body only to let it all go so that I had to start wearing 36 pants, then 38s and now 40s.
FORTIES!!! Oh my god. YOu know what... that's fat. Of course you know that. So... now thing is, what in the hell am I going to do about it.
I want to be careful here. You see, it hurt to lose those last 40 and then lose that I lost them. Does that make any sense? No, I don't think so. But I am equally convinced that my words are being spoken into a quiet void. As silent as one of the winter snow banks we often see out here in Detroit.
I work on an assembly line at an automotive plant out here. It's not that I'm dumb as a stump it's just that that's what there was to do out here and that's what I do. Almost eveyrone I work with is fat. Some are much fatter than I am but I can't worry about them at this point. This is the first time that I have gotten just sick and tired of feeling sluggish. I moved out of chubby a few months ago. I'm definitely in the fatto stage and there are things to do about it.
I think the first thing to do about it is to stop eating like a pig. You fucking normal people, you always say shit like, well why don't you just eat less? Morons. Obviously if I could just eat less I would. Obviously if big monstrous super fatties, which I am not (but could be), obviously they wish that just eating less would help. But it doesn't help people like them or me. It doesn't for the simple reason that we are out of control.
That's the truth. We just can't stop eating crap. At least I know now that I can't. I can not stop eating crap.