Posted by Dennis Menken on February 25, 2001 at 16:24:22:
In Reply to: CONVERSATION BETWEEN BILL CLINTON and Hilary's Bro... posted by Steve Slavin on February 25, 2001 at 16:13:55:
Very funny piece. I have to confess that I have been a big fan of Clinton through everything. I am a Democrat through and through but this last pardon thing just makes me want to puke! George Anus Bush makes me wanna puke even more but giving pardon to fugitive BILLIONAIRES who by access through two bit brother shits makes me want to go ballistic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
: Bill: Hello?
: Hugh: Hello, Bill?
: Bill: Hi, Hughie, how yuh’all doin’?
: Hugh: What can I tell you? Maybe I’ve been living down here in the sunshine state a little too long. Between brother Jeb and that Harris bitch, well it can really turn you off politics. This Florida corruption and nepotism goes way beyond anything I saw growing up around Chicago. Lemme tell you, Bill, Mayor Daley and his family didn’t have nothin’ on the Bushes. I mean, it ain’t what you know – it’s who you know. But don’t let me get started. How’s my sister doin’?
: Bill: The senator? She’s excellent. In fact, on her good days, I sometimes think she’s forgotten most of the crap I’ve pulled on her.
: Hugh: Glad to hear that. Listen, Bill? I don’t want to take up too much of your time, but I’ve got a couple of names I’d like to add to your list of pardons.
: Bill: Sure thing, Hughie. Let me jot them down.
: Hugh: OK, first there’s a guy named Glenn Braswell, a small businessman? He got himself in trouble back in 1983 and did some time for money laundering, tax evasion, and mail fraud.
: Bill: Got ‘em. And who’s the other one?
: Hugh: Carlos Vignali. He’s in jail now for selling cocaine.
: Bill: Wow! Tell me something, Hughie, did he inhale?
: (They both laugh.)
: Hugh: I hope not, because I think he brought in 800 pounds of the stuff.
: Bill: Shoot! Yuh know, ahm thinkin’, maybe it’s not such a good idea tuh pardon the guy. ‘Specially considerin’ all the heat ah had tuh take for just a couple a tokes a weed.
: Hugh: I see what you mean, Bill. Look, personally, I think the guy got a bum rap. He was a first offender, and face it, anyone can make a mistake. So what I’m gonna do is send you the documentation on both guys. You know, the usual testimonials from some bigwigs. In fact we even got a Cardinal or something from the Catholic church.
: Bill: OK, that’ll certainly give me some cover. I mean, didn’t the Pope sell those indulgences? Oh yeah, Hughie, before we get off, I gotta ask you this question. Do you know these guys? Are they personal friends? Because it’ll really look real bad if you’re getting any money for this.
: Hugh: I appreciate you’re asking, Bill. No, Braswell and …and…
: Bill: Vignali?
: Hugh: Whatever. They’re both close personal friends and great guys. And you asked about the money? Sure, they both offered a lot of money, one up front, and the other on a contingency basis. But I’m not taking a penny. I’m doing it because it’s the right thing to do. So we got a deal?
: Bill: Sure thing, Hughie. I gotta run now. They’re havin’ a two-fer-one special at McDonald’s.
: (They hang up.)
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