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Re: My husband lies-says everyone does

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Posted by Patricia Alice on June 10, 2001 at 20:43:34:

In Reply to: Re: My husband lies-says everyone does posted by distraught on June 10, 2001 at 13:47:56:

You are certainly not the bad person! Congratulations for doing the hard work of actually facing your feelings and your fears and getting with your husband and a counselor to attempt to work things out. Your husband seems very frightened that he may have to encounter himself in a real way. If a person is used to lying it's usually because they are running away from things about themselves that they don't want to face. If you give this relationship time, and work on it with a counselor, you can have the honest and trusting marriage you desire.

: My husband and I have talked and talked. We also went to a therapist last week. Since we saw the therapist, in the heat of anger, he stated that he wanted a divorce. He also keeps asking me if there is any chance in this working. I've stated that we have to keep trying and hope for the best. At this point, we have agreed to work at the relationship some more. He wants to find out "why he lies". He is analyzing himself and has thanked me for giving him a chance. I still feel like hell, because he knew from the beginning of our relationship that I had trust issues. He thinks that he may actually be the one afraid of trusting. In couseling, we found out that he likes to be secretive. This is not what I wanted to hear. Why am I feeling like the bad person here? Marriage is built on honesty, trust and openess.

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