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How To Tell A Lie Without Moving Your Lips!

Sounds impossible,but it's true! I know...



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I was once sitting on the London Underground Train when 3 absolutely gorgeous, tall teenage girls got on and sat opposite me.  They looked very healthy,very happy and very, very sexy.

Being a good catholic boy I could not look at them or take my eyes off them.

Such close proximity to blossoming womanhood forced me to do what all commuters do when overcome with panic.  I pretended I needed to read!!

I calmly picked up my bag to get out a magazine. Unfortunately, as I was reaching for my bag, I glanced over at them, and they were all looking at me to see what I was going to do.  They were all gazing at my bag with great interest... Jeezus!! Wobble wobble quiver tremble!!!

                                                   Finding three of the most beautiful sets of eyes I had ever seen, all looking at my bag with great interest, I almost fainted!  They had all stopped talking and were all really looking to see what I was going to get from my bag.  I had never felt so important in my whole life.

Instead of fainting, I opened my bag, looked inside,and completely forgot why I had got my bag out in the first place.  I had no idea why I was even diggin through it.  I realised they were all still watching, so I kinda frowned a bit and started searching in my bag.  The three Scandanavian (by now in mind they were definitely from Norway or Sweden) girls were by now watching me with silent but intense interest.

I frowned more and started searching all the different pockets of my bag more and more frantically, looking very ,very distressed.  At first I was able to glance over at them and kinda give a little 'I know it's  somewhere' kinda grin but  the more I searched, the more worried they looked, so the more worried I pretended to look.  This was preposterous!!!


I stood up and started to go through my jean pockets.   I reached in my back pocket and started searching frantically through my wallet.


I looked very distressed... as if I had lost something of great value.

As  the train pulled into the next station, I gathered my belongings and it was obvious that the three lovelies opposite me were in a state of some anxiety about all I had been through.

One of them asked, with great concern, "Are you ok?"

I could hardly speak and just nodded.  I got off the train in a state of apparently great sadness.  As the train pulled away they were all peering out at me with very sad faces.  I stood on the platform as they disappeared into the tube.

From the looks on their faces, it seemed I had ruined their holiday.

The sight of them had made my day but I panicked because I was not brought up in a way that taught me to be myself in the sight of such beauty. Ridiculous or what?!





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